Being Strict Isn’t Enough — Here’s How Teachers Build Trust

Strict Teacher Who Makes Learning Fun

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Know I do come across as a strict teacher, but I try to make the experience in class fun and a place where they want to learn. And this Friday, any kid that had all their assignments turned in, uh I ended up giving them bags of chips. They get rewarded for the hard work that they get, kind of like a paycheck at the end of the week. Kids kind of standing up for the kid that is getting bullied. Hey, don't say that to him. Don't say that to him. Don't say that to her. They also have a basketball court right outside in my driveway. And so they they go and play basketball. So that's what a lot of kids aren't doing.

SPEAKER_01 0:29

Welcome to the Yog Nation, the Spirit of Gratitude podcast on the One Tigration platform. Hello, friends. My name is Yogesh Patel, and this podcast explores the themes of bullying, self-awareness, and the power of our inner spirit, including the silent battles we all face. Join me every week as I invite high-profile guests as we explore how adversity shapes us, how gratitude lifts us, and how we can all uncover the inner strength that we all have within ourselves. Join the conversation. I appreciate you listening in.

SPEAKER_02 1:01

So did the kids want you as their teacher, or do they say, oh, Mr. Hernandez, he's not a good teacher. He's mean.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

You know, one of the things is a compliment coming from teachers is that kids tell you tell other teachers that uh we're too strict. Because that's just saying, oh, if I go to Mr. Hernandez's room, I'm gonna have to work. He is gonna hold me accountable. And that's the one thing, yeah. I I I I am a strict teacher. I you know, like I might make my kids pick up their pants before they walk into my class. You look good, you feel good, and you do good. And that's my comment. As soon as they come in. Oh, you just you're just not uh hip like us. I'm like, I'm hip. You know what I mean? I I always joke around with it. Chicago Cubs can't you're a hip. Yes, right. But uh uh, but it is we do we do come across, you know, I do come across as as a strict teacher, but I try to make the the experience in class uh fun and and and a place where they want to learn.

Makeup Friday And Simple Rewards

SPEAKER_00 2:02

And I do I do this one thing called uh uh makeup Friday. So they were working hard Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. Friday's makeup Friday. So I'm gonna let them work on their makeup work in case they miss some assignment in my class. They got to finish what my my assignments first before they start working on other classes' assignments. And those are normally the kids that are the ones that are always on it, and though they're either working on other class assignments or they if if they're all caught up, then they have uh a few minutes to relax and just you know enjoy their friends that are you know that are also caught up in class. But uh uh that they they look forward to it because I put on the biggest loser and and uh and I justify that because I'm a health teacher and it's a health show. So uh so I put the show on and the kids get to do their makeup work and and and enjoy the the whole idea of uh you know, okay, he's rewarding us, he's giving us time for ourselves to make sure we catch up in case I didn't I didn't get to work on it later earlier in the week, but now I'm just hearing it. And so that kind of wins them over. They look forward to this uh this Friday. Any kid that had all their assignments turned in, uh I ended up giving them bags of chips. And so they they the kids were coming up, oh, I finished my two assignments this week. Uh here's your bag of chips. And so that tells that's another reinforcement, not just oh, because they get to eat, but the fact that they get rewarded for for the hard work that they get, kind of like a paycheck at the end of the week.

What Counts As Bullying

SPEAKER_02 3:27

So it looks like you've built a lot of trust with these kids, and I was just curious if they've ever come to you um about being bullied or cyberbullied, and how have you responded or dealt with that as a high school teacher?

SPEAKER_00 3:38

You know, the bullying is gonna be everywhere. You know, it's gonna be it's it's something as simple as them like making fun of somebody's shoes or all your haircut here, or you know. Is that really bullying or just teasing? I I I you know, you you look at it, if it makes someone feel bad, then yes, it's bullying. Right? If you're teasing somebody, you're gonna be like uh they they're probably friends, and uh, but any point where they're coming to a point where the other person feels uncomfortable or feels um uh how am I trying to say this? They feel like they're being excluded from the rest of the kids, or or they're trying to tell them that you know you're not part of us, then that's bullying. Uh, and and that's not allowed in my classroom. And and I'm I'm pretty sure that most of the teachers in our school are gonna say the same thing. You don't have nothing nice to say, don't say it at all. You know what I mean? Um, like I told some one student one time, I'm like, there's a difference between you telling, hey, your shoes aren't tied to a student, be careful to, hey, you're an idiot. Look at you, you're gonna trip over your clothes, trip over your own shoes. You can't even walk. There's a big difference in that, even though they're friends, uh, but uh uh has a student ever come up to me and say that they've been bullied? Uh I don't want to say that I have had any students, but you we have noticed, uh, you're gonna notice it anyway, right? Uh but you have noticed and you talk to the kids, and and for the most part, we have a really good community, um primarily uh Hispanic community, and and um but uh the demographics are Hispanic, uh Caucasian, and and some African American, uh, but uh it's mostly Hispanic. And you know, you do see it happening, but what you do also see is kids kind of standing up for the kid that is uh getting bullied. Hey, don't don't say that to him. Don't say that to him, don't say that to her. Or or you know, they they kind of stand up for them, and and sometimes I don't even have to intervene because they've noticed that, oh, if I'm picking on this kid, then everyone's not gonna want to talk to me because I'm being a jerk, I'm being a bully. And so that that that's and and sometimes that's when you pull the kid at the end of the class and say, Thank you for doing that. You know, you did something you did something really amazing.

Self-Harm Concerns And Fast Help

SPEAKER_02 5:50

Yeah, that's interesting because I mean, from my perspective, I had a chance to speak to uh uh I was invited to Nobellas High School speaking with uh their high school students. I think uh they were sophomore and juniors, and the intent was to spread the podcast messaging to these kids, and it was incredible what I learned. I think it was less around bullying than it was just finding their own inner demons in terms of uh that's part of it. I mean, some of the questions I I was asked by an athlete, it's like, well what what um I'm a soccer player, what would you say to me in terms of uh how could you motivate me? And I kind of go back to what Nick Laurie said on the podcast in his episode where um he mentions why not you, right? Why not you to be the best athlete on the field, right? Um so that was helpful. I mean, I was able to you know get that pretty quickly, but others, you know, uh we're talking about body image, which is understandable in high school, but the thing that tugged at at my soul was uh this concept of self-hurt. And that to me is you know, shook me. It's like, why would you even think that right? This concept of hurting yourself. And so just curious if that's what if if you've seen that as well.

SPEAKER_00 7:04

You know, um normally uh students that are getting down that path, you know, luckily we do have, I believe, uh two or three social workers. And so if we ever do face that, you know, that's the first thing we want to do. We want to get them to their counselor, first of all, and their console, if they feel like they have to refer them to our social worker, they'll get them there. And this all can happen within 45 minutes, you know, like from them leaving my class to get to the concert, getting to the social worker. Uh and some sometimes we don't even send them to the council, they go straight to the social worker. Uh and I mean, uh, do kids think of that? Of course, anywhere you go, you you're going to see that happening.

SPEAKER_02 7:41

Why though? I mean, it wasn't like that. I mean, maybe we're old school, right? But I never had thoughts like this, right?

SPEAKER_00 7:48

You know what? I again it goes back to technology.

Technology Community And Keeping Kids Active

SPEAKER_00 7:50

I think uh, you know, we used to go out and play in the alleys and play basketball to like midnight, and then you know the lights come on. Uh for us, if if we were in a back alley and we were on the behind my house, my parents didn't care how long I was out there as long as we weren't causing any trouble. Right? But uh and then normally normally I was with my older brothers, and so or we were with you know some friends, and and my parents knew those friends and they knew their parents, and so it was that community. It it it was, and and the thing is like you if and if you're not part of your own community, you establish your own community with your friends. You know what I mean? So like that whole own community, your my parents know know uh their parents, so they oh yeah, Jim's over here, don't worry about it. If if I'll I'll go take him if if anything. So at that point, you it was fine. So a lot of kids don't do that these days. They don't go out and they don't hang out, they get home, they're stuck on their video games. Um, and and it's one of the reasons why I'm so adamant about my kids being part of travel baseball, the football team, uh playing football, you know, uh just being part of any clubs. So my kids are busy. Like, I I know we've been going back and forth trying to get on this podcast uh going. Uh, but the fact is that my kids have so much baseball. You know, I mean, like they were talking about putting a game today, and I was like, oh man, I got a four o'clock uh with Yogi. I I don't want to cancel because I've already canceled twice. Um and uh luckily luckily it it rained and so they canceled it. But uh I I was almost gonna call you earlier today and be like, hey, I might have to push it back another hour or something. That's that's a priority, obviously. Yeah, and so it's great that my kids are so busy. And and yes, they come home, they're upstairs playing video games right now. We just got home from church and and uh they went upstairs because I wanted it quiet down here. And so it's yeah, they get to play video games, but they also have a basketball court right outside in my driveway, and and so they they go and play basketball. So so that's what a lot of kids aren't doing.